Ways To Get Interest in Your Relationship Back – Learn From My Story

Does “Then they lived happily ever after” exist in real life or is it just a fictional term? Well, in real life there may be any rare couple who does not have to face any bumps in this journey. It certainly is a blessing that you get married to the person you fall in love, and who seems to be compassionate and understanding. Love is a really beautiful feeling, and you get overwhelmed with it. Falling in love with your desired person and getting married sounds the perfect story. However, many things come across when you start living together and bound in a relationship with loads of responsibilities. My husband and I came across similar kind of situation. As nothing seems to work for us. We were losing interest in each other. I cannot point out a single thing, yet the picture did not seem perfect. We did spend time together, but THAT spark was missing. Once passionate love and intense intimacy seemed like history. Communication gap seemed to stretched. This situation was painful for both of us. We spoke to each other and unanimously decided to consult a good couples counselling¬†service. Moreover, well, I must say, it was worth visiting.

Consulting a marriage counsellor proved to be an excellent decision. Initial sessions boosted up my morale and confidence. Both of us were willing to pursue our relationship. Our couple counsellor did a great job and helped us in overcoming our issues. After listening to both sides of the story, he advised us to take an intimacy test. I was feeling a bit scared and hesitant at first but remained consistent. The questionnaire was thorough, and I have always been cautious about discussing my personal feelings out loud. Nonetheless, it was a vital thing to go through.

Intimacy test, recommended by our counsellor, included all kinds of relationship questions. It was coupled satisfaction index (CSI), and we have to rate our feelings in response to all the issues. Some of these problems were like,

How happy are you in this relationship:

Extremely Unhappy

Fairly

Little

Somewhat

Happy

Very Happy

Extremely Happy

Perfect

0

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

There were some questions to check the disagreement in a relationship, in which some situations were presented, and we had to answer that how would we react in such circumstances. Such as,

Please show the extent of agreement or disagreement between your partner and you, while making a significant decision for your home in general or anything special.

Always Disagree

Agree Most Of The Times

Little

Agree Rarely

Frequently Agree

Pretty Much Always Agree

Always Agree

0

1

2

3

4

5

6

Similar choices were given to answer a few other questions like, how often you grab some time to spend together? How much affection you feel for your partner?

Most of the questions were designed to check what we think about our relationship. Such as how many times you think that this relationship was a mistake? Alternatively, do you think that things are going well with your partner? Do you wish to terminate this relationship? In almost all questions we have to rate what exactly this relationship means to us, and how do we compare our relationship with other couples?

Well, it was not that difficult, as I was thinking it to be. Moreover, it made things easy for our counsellor to judge the situation, our opinions about each other, and worth of being in this relationship. In light of all these, our marriage counsellor gave us some cool and interesting tips. These tips helped us. I would like to list few of them.

Take a Break From Work and Visit Some Mutually Favourite Travel Destination

Not spending any time together just to sit back, relax and enjoy, was the major disastrous thing for us. It certainly happens when our office became our 1st, 2nd and 3rd priority, and no spot left for family or loved ones. Going on some vacation was an interesting and cool tip for us. As it is been ages that we went together or enjoyed any natural beauty with only two of us. This thing also refreshed our mind; we felt more relaxed and content. It is like renewing your marriage and enjoying a second honeymoon.

Touch More Often

Touch produces sexual arousal, care, comfort and compassion. All those feelings that we were unable to experience. In the beginning, it seemed a bit difficult but after some time it felt good. Little things like holding hands while walking together, casual hug, or a little kiss could make a significant difference. It helped in going back to our more compassionate stage.

Throw Out Your Grudges

If you want to pursue your relationship, then you must put all the grudges back, and start new. Live and enjoy the moment. There is nothing but a pain in recalling any mean comment or action. Best thing therapy is to write all your complaints on a paper and burn it into ashes. Trust me; it will relax you a lot.

Try Some Arousal-Generating Activities

When our counsellor advised this, it felt a bit funny and weird to me. However, he was right, obviously! Certain harsh physical activities increase your adrenaline rush, and you felt aroused. Such activities include a strenuous hike or some roller-coaster ride with full of excitement. This excitement and adrenaline spark your passion, and you feel a dire need of making love.

Every relationship goes through some rocky road, once in a lifetime. Ironically, differences between a couple play a vital role in strengthening the relationship. If you are committed to that person, you will surely try to solve things out. Just be honest and communicate every single bit of your emotions before him/ her, while accepting his flaws as is. I learnt a lot during our sessions to the couple counsellor. Tips were fascinating and helped us save our marriage.